Friday, April 16, 2010

KFC: Oh, Why Have You Forsaken Me?

BEDA: April 16, 2010

KFC. I love you, but this affair has to stop...sometime soon. Well, nevermind.

The restaurant chain Kentucky Fried Chicken always seems to have a new innovation in food around the corner. Remember the TV ads for KFC's “Famous Bowl”? It consists of mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, cheese, and chicken. Take those ingredients, put in a bowl, and stir.

Then you'd be introduced to the world's laziest fast food craze to date.

Don't get me wrong, I've had a Famous Bowl or two in my day and they were actually really good. When I go to McDonald's or Burger King I always eat the fries first and then the sandwich. It's always in that order so the fries don't get cold. I'm weird but logical.


Recently, KFC unveiled their new-age food item, the Double Down sandwich. Let me give you a run down on what the Double Down sandwich consists of.

Two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets, two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel's Sauce. Yea, quite a mouthful. Not to mention, no bun. The tagline for the sandwich is "This product is so meaty, there’s no room for a bun!" Doesn't that just sound just so American?

So, of course, I ordered one.

To get to the point of the subject of this blog, it's not that I didn't enjoy the Double Down sandwich. It's not even that it was a tad bit expensive ($7.99 for the meal)

It's that it was too awesome.

People say, "Too much of a good thing is a bad thing," and with food, they mean that eating too much food has negative consequences on the body. The problem with my body plus the Double Down sandwich was not that there was too much Double Down for me to eat, it was that my body ate it too fast. Again, very American, am I right? So, I inhaled that thing in maybe two minutes(?) and it tasted wonderful. I'm not even an evening-bacon kinda guy and I loved it.

But have you ever eaten something fast and then felt it crawl down to your stomach? Yea, that happened. Plus, seeing as how the only food I ate previous was a large chocolate egg (the egg from my DailyBooth picture) it probably wasn't a good idea to dive right into a couple pounds of grilled chicken deliciousness.

Now, before you guys get any ideas, no I didn't get sick, no I didn't regret it, no I wasn't stuck in the bathroom for hours throwing up. My body is pretty awesome when it comes to processing food and by now it's used to the fact that A) I'm a boy so I eat a lot, B) I'm an American so I eat a lot of junk, C) I'm a college kid so I eat a lot more junk, and D) I try new things which, ya know, means I try new things.

So in conclusion, if you like chicken, try the Double Down sandwich at least once. Your fingers will get greasy with chicken but it is so totally wonderful.

America is always coming up with ways to get us fed and plump.
Like, for a slaughter.
But that's its right.

I heart America.


  1. I am definitely going to have to try one of those bad boys. I'm not quite fat enough and I need to something about that.

  2. I have yet to see an ad for one of those, but it sounds ... intriguing?
    I think I'd be likely to split it with someone. 'Cause y'know, I'm a girl so I need to eat daintily.
    Plus, I don't like bacon. (Gasp!)

  3. While I think it's ridiculous that Carl's Jr./Hardy's didn't come up with this first I'm actually really wanting to try one myself. I don't have to worry about messing up an iPad or other touch screen device after/while eating it. I just wonder why KFC is releasing this fresh off their kick for healthier grilled chicken.

    Chick-Fil-A may have the claim of the first chicken sandwich but KFC has one upped the idea completely.

  4. I can't eat at the local KFC here. It's disgusting. Mold on the side of the building, an open and rather large garbage bin 10 feet from the window, and people that work there that would most likely spit in your food or drug it (Siriusly, I know the guys...)

    Although I love KFC, and even though it's VERY unhealthy, the Famous Bowls and the Double Down Sandwiches are amazing...

  5. To be honest, had this been introduced ten months ago when I was still eating meat I would've be all over it. As an American I would have mocked it and talked about how it was terrible for me or how only in my ridiculous country would a sandwich be invented consisting almost entirely of meat. I would say all this and probably more whist waiting in line at the drive through to get my own double down sandwich.